24 March 2007

Going Grocer

I'm going to rant on grocery shopping for just a moment. Then I'll be fine.

1) Treat the aisles as ROADS. People need to be able to get by while you read labels for dolphin friendly Rice a Roni. It's as if they've never been to a grocery store, ever. Indecisive, meandering shoppers make me, a fairly normal and calm person, want to go postal. (this doesn't include old people because they can't help it. I'm not a complete bitch)

2) Remember in school: We all took turns? We said "Excuse me" "Please" "Thank you".
Just think of this as a big school. Use your manners.

3) I know the racecar shopping carts are cute and the kids like them. But they're the size of three shopping cars taped together. Invariably the mother that's "driving" is completely oblivous to the fact that no one can get around her. See complaint #1
AND usually the kid is awful, rarely they're cute.
3-a) If your child is a screaming banshee, please for the Love of God and All Things Holy: take them home and get mac & cheese later. Seriously.

4) When did the grocery store turn out to be the social arena for old people? Perhaps it's because I shop during the week now but every time I go there's a bunch of old people hanging out, Starbucks in hand, and chatting over the lettuce. And, there's nothing like walking in front of the bench of old men who even though they are old, are probably still having the thoughts of fourteen year old boys.

*deep cleansing breath* Now that I've ranted about it, I'll be better able to cope next time I go. Theoretically.

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