10 April 2011


Marriage and weddings have been randomly popping up in conversations lately.  I realize that it is Spring so bear with me.

Howard Stern mentioned the other day that his wife randomly texted him "I love being married."  I thought that was very sweet.  I do enjoy that about texting: a person can be impulsively romantic.

There was discussion of whether or not your husband wears a wedding band.  Kevin doesn't because of his job, it's a hazard and I'd rather he keep all his fingers.   My ex-husband wore his and fat lot of good it did so I really don't mind either way.

One of Kevin's coworkers is going through a divorce but he still wears his wedding band.  He has noticed that it is a chick magnet.  I wonder why that is?  I would be offended if I were approached by someone who was wearing their wedding band.

That brings us to a most recent development in our lives.  my nineteen year old niece has decided to get married.  She will be the third generation to get married at a young age for all the wrong reasons. My mom married & left home at 17 to a guy going into the service.  I married at 19 to a guy that could never survive the service.  My niece is marrying a guy currently in the service, just short of turning twenty.

I am thinking about the odd symmetry that has traveled three generations.   Each of us seem to have married at a young age to get out of a situation.  In my, and my moms, case it was leaving an unhealthy home life.  I don't believe that is the case with my niece but I do believe she is running away.

Which brings up attending weddings that a person doesn't support, for whatever reasons.  The worst example we can give is going to a wedding of a cousin who was marrying a man that we know abuses her.    Where does a person draw a line? 

Marriages and weddings, they bring up such ethical questions!! What do you think, poppets?  Wedding bands?  Young marriages?  Attending weddings you don't support?


1 comment:

AmyBean said...

I think it depends on who's getting married. If it's someone you love, like a sister or close friend, you go -- not in support of the marriage, but in support of that person. To let them know that you're there for them, even when you don't agree with them. I think in the example you gave of the abusive would-be spouse, that woman needs all the support she can get. So you let her know that you don't approve of the union, but you support her anyway, and you're there for her no matter what. It makes it easier for her to come to you if she decides she wants out of the marriage.

If it's someone you're not close to and you don't approve, then no, I wouldn't go. But going to the wedding doesn't necessarily mean you approve of the decision. It just means that you're there for the person, and you want them to be happy, and you'll support them in finding that happiness, in whatever form it may come.