One of our friends got married today. It was a lovely, simple wedding full of laughter. The only odd thing, for me really, was the absence of his older brother who was killed when I was 18 years old. His brother and I knew each other since middle school. He was the first classmate to die from my graduating class, having gone down on a fishing boat two months after graduation.
The boys became friends with our friend before I fully realized who he was. My only memory of him was a smart ass freshman that was only allowed to live through his freshman year due to his big brother's cred. I am relieved to say that while still a smartass, he's turned into a very nice man. It's been a little weird from time to time, when he reminds me of his brother. Mostly, I am glad that he is in our circle of friends and amazed at how small this world really is.
This is his second marriage, her first. He married his high school sweetheart & they grew apart. He changed again after his divorce, learning from his mistakes and markedly making an effort to become a better person. He has two kids, a teen & preteen, and she wants one of her own. He's totally excited about it and we predict a baby in nine months and counting.
The point of this ramble, I suppose, is that we all change. He went from being a smartass kid to a really good man, possibly, likely, from the protection and then loss of his brother and the ability to learn from his mistakes & circumstances.
I can only hope to continue to grow the way he has.
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