Step, Ball, Change - Raising Parents Update

 I had alternative titles for this post: Raising Parents Hokey Pokey and This is the worst game of Whack A Mole I have ever played.  This dance move title seems more accurate though.

On Friday we were finally approved by Medicaid.  There was a last minute record request on Thursday that had a by-end-of-next-day turn-around.  Luckily we were able to make it happen because if not, there were actual financial repercussions. 5,015 of them.

At 3:55 pm we were approved for Medicaid. We were so relieved that the 90-day nightmare was coming to an end.

Then my phone rang and it was the caseworker from the facility.  They had reviewed the f-i-l's status and wondered if we would be open to transferring him to a new facility. Because he was deemed Too Healthy for where he is now.

WUT.  

To be fair, we had kind of wondered as he seems to be one of the more relatively healthy residents and even the staff have acknowledged that. He can be mobile in a wheelchair, he has basic verbal abilities, can do very basic care independently, and can make some low-level decisions on his own.   But we hadn't taken it further than a pondering with *waving of hands around my body* going on.  

We hesitantly agreed to an evaluation from the other facility.  It's a block away at furthest and has recently been remodeled.  It closed after the pandemic and now is reopening as a memory care center so this feels like it might be a good fit.  However, it appears to be more of an Assisted Living facility vs. a SNF so we have concerns.   But this is nothing that can't be answered with an evaluation of f-i-l and a tour completed by me.  We have actually became kind of excited about the opportunity.

And then...

Just have a seat...just do it...maybe an adult beverage too.

He fell. That very same day.  And didn't tell anyone. AGAIN. And yes, even in the facility.  

He was standing in his room and fell; bonked his head and hurt his back.  Again. It happened in the late morning and he didn't tell anyone until late afternoon.  We are waiting for the x-rays but it sounds like he re-injured L1 and L2.  The bonk on the head did not present with a bruise or even a red mark so we're thankful for that.  The original injury recovery for L1 and L2 was estimated at 6 mos. to never.  We are not even 90-days into that timeframe.

Now he's back to bedridden and on painkillers again.  We're hoping that the painkillers are temporary so we don't have another episode of hospital delirium.  Update: they are because he doesn't want to take them.

I am going to tour the new facility tomorrow all the same. We don't know if the injury will disqualify him or not.  The hope is that they will still say "Come on over" and then perhaps he'll be in a facility more suited for him.   The person I spoke to said they're a SNF and Assisted Living with a Memory Care focus, so I'm hopeful.

Funny interesting, not funny haha, is that way back in the 1900's when I was in high school, I was a busboy/dishwasher at the new facility.  I actually liked the job, it was part-time and I could work there around my other job(s).  I ended up quitting because Satan and his family didn't like that I worked on the sabbath. Sigh.

So in less than three hours we went from the high of finally accomplishing Medicaid and the possibility of an exciting move to what-feels-like right back to square one.  This, I am sad to acknowledge, seems to be the theme of this part of life.  

AND Step, Ball, Change.

Today I visited the possible new facility and it is AMAZING.  It's more residential than hospital and they assure me they can meet all his needs. He would be in a shared room but it has a bathroom in the room, and can be made to be much more homelike.  Also, it feels like they won't allow him to pout in his room and will have him eating with the residents instead of in his room.   

I also spoke with the current facility who feels like this fall is not going to prevent him from being transferred. WHEW.  They feel like there was just bruising and general soreness from falling.  Double Whew.

Now that I'm excited about the change, I'm waiting for the pendulum to swing and change that.

But we're back to waiting for Medicaid to complete their part of the process.  I'm supposed to have a call from them tomorrow for next steps.  Oh, I think I forgot to mention that I have a new caseworker. The one I had is "working in a different department now" and I'm hoping that different department is the janitor's closet. (no shade to janitors)

And of course, the new facility had a list of required documents. The facilities only share health information amongst themselves, not full files and that seems silly.  But you know me, I had everything ready and just clicked Send to the provided email.

We haven't approached this subject with Dad yet. (broached? what's the right word there) because we don't want to get his hopes up and/or make him anxious.  The last time there was a change he was low-key suicidal.  We're hoping that we can HYPE this potential move up so that he will be excited too.

As we know though, things can change in a minute.  Step, ball, change.