Seasonal Anxiety

The new racing season began last month. We won’t be ready, in fact we’ll be starting late this year. We aren’t making a run for a championship because of the late start. It is also just too big of a time commitment & too freaking expensive for us. Racing at this level is incredibly expensive and while I feel lucky that we are able to even try it, I am beginning to wonder if it's worth all the stress. I mentioned to Kev the other day that we were one of the big boys now. It's an odd feeling and a huge accomplishment.

I am stressing, as I always do and not just because of the cost. This season we have a new combination & Kevin will be going faster. That's always a change for us, it's the nature of the beast, but really, he will be going quite faster.

He has all the safety gear plus some. A helmet, a roll cage, firesuit, gloves, neck brace, parachute. As I am writing this, I've realized we haven't ordered his shoes. Sh*t. Everything is mechanically sound. I never worry about that. Sure things can break but I don't ever let that enter my head. Until he makes his first pass in one piece and we get the number we're looking for, I will be holding my breath.

To add to the fun, this year will require me to be more participatory. Well, more than I already am. This year requires my presence on the actual track, not just observing, during every single pass. I will have to line him up properly so that he is what they call "in the groove". It is a lot of responsibility. It's a safety thing for Kevin.

The picture above is a good example. This is Kevin finishing his burn-off. I have to be brave enough to stand in front of the car as it is coming toward me (Hello Trust Exercise) then guide him in his own tracks as he backs up. For safety and performance, he has to be straight and in the groove. He will be depending on me.

Because when he leaves, it looks like this:

Also, this requires me to be in front of people, sometimes lots of people. I've done it before, at a smaller track that requires such precision. Now it will be every time, regardless of the track. Every pass, every track, no matter what.

Another thing to think about is what to wear. There aren't requirements for crew members but I was thinking about buying some red shirts to wear anyway. It's hot as hell down there so this will take some thinking. Also if we race in Vegas this year, crew members are going to be required to wear team shirts. I can't even wrap my mind around that. Team. Shirts. Vegas.

So, yeah. It's all about what to wear.