Last Sunday Kevin and I went out to dinner, it was nothing special and not too far away. It was just an hour to check out for a period of time and not be In It. We tried (failed some) to keep the topic away from family and hospice.
After dinner, we went to the store because we needed some storage bins. It's a store that I loathe but it was the closest. We got what we needed then had to walk nearly the length of the store to check out because none of the register were open on the side we entered. (loathe that store)
We checked out and was walking back to the truck when I spotted a coin machine. "Oh, Kevin, there's a coin machine. We should really get your parents coins and take care of it." We parked far away from the store because parking at this particular store always results in door dings and scratches (LOATHE that store) "I don't have the energy or want to walk all the way there and all the way back."
Kevin jogged ahead and got the grocery bag full of PENNIES. He had seen them in the original container and didn't realize I'd transferred them into a bag. "I'm not walking into a store, alone, with a bucket full of change." He agreed that was wise.
As he's carrying the bag, he comments on how heavy it was. "I wonder how many pennies are in there?"
I said "I bet it's less than you think because pennies. It always seems like a lot then it's two dollars."
"How much do you think there is, guess."
"$5.75"
"No" he says incredulously "There's got to be more. "$9.37. No, no. $12. It's $12"
So we "bet" which amount it was and continued to the machine. We're laughing as I'm trying to lift the slide full of pennies while he's trying to dump them out of the plastic grocery bag. "Ooops, one fell!" I said and bent down to pick it up. Upon rising, Kevin looks me in the eye and said "It's a PENNY. You just cost yourself money picking it up." As in, if you valuate your time into money, I just wasted my money. Only Kevin would think of such a thing.
Then there was the smell. For some reason, they smelled terrible. Like moldy crayons, almost. AND this is Kevin who can smell like only three things. They were stored in a kitchen canister, in their bedroom, so I can't guess why they smelled so badly.
The machine was audibly slowing down so I reached down to make sure that there weren't any discards. There was A BUNCH. So I started scooping them back up into the machine. Then Kevin stared just placing them on the side of the machine so I wasn't just cycling the same bad pennies again and again.
There were Canadian coins, tokens from Chuck E. Cheese and some pennies that were so deteriorated that they no longer looked like pennies. Kevin said "Just leave them there, it will make some little kid's day to find them" So we did.
We watched the screen as it continued to count. I looked at the wrong number, the number that was after the fee was deducted. Kevin looked at the right number and backed up with one finger gun "You are SO WRONG. I am right. You.are.a.loser" and I started laughing. (it's one of those situations that I'm certain people think he's being a jackass when he's just being funny)
"Yes, yes, you were right. You're very smart. Let's figure out how to get our money."
We went to customer service and asked. They said "You can put it on a store gift card..." I hear an emphatic NO from Kevin behind me "Or you can cash it out" We walked to the register and explained that it wasn't our money so we needed to cash it out.
"ALSO" Kevin pauses then says "I need to point out..." and the cashier looked nervous "I was right and she was SO TOTALLY WRONG." The cashier laughed but in that nervous way in which she's trying to decide if she needs to call security.
Then, he starts to figure out How Close he was to being Right versus How Far I was to being Wrong. "Too much mathing!!" I practically shout at him. He continues "Carry the two, divide by five" figures it out and announces "That makes me EVEN MORE right!"
We're starting to laugh, the kind of laugh where you're precariously close to just absolutely losing it and needing the cashier to call security. Finally, Kevin says "We should really go now..."
It was nice to have a tiny taste of normalcy. Well, normalcy for us.
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