25 June 2020

The Other One Was Purple

What day is it? Thursday.  Okay.  We made it one week.

Guess who took my father-in-law's phone back today?  *this girl*

I KNOW.

Kevin phoned this morning with a question and I had to hang up on him because his mother was phoning.  It was early enough in the morning, for them, that it had alarm bells ringing in our heads.

"Um, honey. Were you sleeping?" (gah, I shouldn't hate that question as much as I do)

"Are you going to town today?"

I'm already rubbing my forehead in frustration and it's been one minute into the conversation.

"I am. Later today. Why?"

"Well, um, we were wondering if you would mind taking Dad's phone back and getting one like he used to have."

*deep breath* *count to three* *Modulate my tone*

"Sure, no problem. I will come get it later today when I know I'm heading into town."

"Okay. Well, we just don't want to be any trouble..."

Oh, oh, that ship has sailed, sunk, been resurfaced, and sailed again.

"Nope, not a problem.  I'll come over in a little while"

I disconnect and phone Kevin back.  "He wants to get another phone."

Silence

"Fine.  Whatever it costs, just fix it" he finally musters.

Fast forward a few hours and I walk over there.  My m-i-l is unpacking groceries in the kitchen.  "Where is Dad? I'm going to exchange his phone."

"Oh" she turns around and looks at his empty recliner "He's...."   "...."  Wanders to her chair.

Sweet, tiny, 8 lb. 6 oz baby jesus.  Their house is tiny. There are like TWO OPTIONS of where he might be.

"Oh, he's outside!!!" she remembers.  Because of course he is.  

She calls out for him and he shuffles across the yard.  Taking the phone out of his pocket, he hands it up to me.  "I can't get the calendar to work.  I called your sister and got stuck in that screen again."  (sister-in-law but whatever at this point. But he has two sons and no daughters)  

I flipped open the phone and it's on the main screen.  Hit the CALL LOG and it says he called my sister-in-law this morning.  "But your phone says that you called her."  

"I DIDN'T. I couldn't get out of the calendar!"  Okay, dude, calm down.

My mother-in-law pipes in "I called her."  I started to ask her from which phone and realized the upcoming error in judgement just in time.  

"Okay. Well, it will be a little bit because I'm going to work first."

Off I go to the store, again.  This time there was a bit of a wait but standing outside in the sun is nice.  The ten-year-old rep started by asking "How long have you had it?"  Now, I had already prepared to just buy a new #$#%% phone if they wouldn't exchange it.  I told him "One week, probably nearly to the minute."  
"Oh, it's less than fourteen days so you're good." He did everything then said "Now, let me make sure that we have one in stock."  *Record scratch*   

I literally and actually thought "I will burn this store down if you don't have that phone."  Outside of my brain, I said "Great! Let's assume you do!" with a pleasant smile.

Everything went smoothly again and ten minutes later, off I go. Fast forward through the work stuff, etc.  I got home and set everything up.  This is admittedly a nicer phone for a flip phone.  I will acknowledge that.  The calendar was in it's rightful place so it should be fine.  I had it set up in no time at all and just had to wait for it's initial full charge.

Again, I waited for Kevin to come home so he could deliver it.  He came home, set his stuff down, and headed next door with the phone.

Like, two minutes pass MAX and my phone rings.  I will admit to very VIVID IMAGERY going through my brain at seeing my phone being called from next door.  Deep breath, answer the phone and it's Kevin.

"What color was the old phone?"

"What?  Why?" Why is this a thing, I'm thinking

"What color was the other phone? Not the one you just got rid of but the original one."

"Black"

What color was it again?"

"Black"  I don't have the energy to ask why this is a thing.

"Okay, sorry but hold on. Mother, I'm putting her on speaker.  (sound of speaker turned on)  What color was the old phone?"

There is sputtering in the background, muttering.

"It was BLACK.  But I will go check."

"No, that's all I need." he says and starts to hang up.

"Wait, I'm looking at it.  I was a little wrong. It's dark blue.  Like carbon fiber blue."

"Mom, wait. No Mom, Surely was mistaken but you were still wrong."  I hear as he disconnects.

Because I'm a nerd, I texted him this:



I didn't get a response and was a little relieved.  He eventually came back home but in his Kevin-like way, he has completely forgotten about the phone now.  I chose to just move on with my life.

So, I started dinner and my phone rings.  Sonofabiscuitdog.  It's Kevin's mom.

"Hi honey. Were you sleeping?"  I'm telling you: EVERY SINGLE TIME she says it.  

"We were wondering how much it cost to switch the phone?"

This is where  I say that I didn't even pay attention, did not care, have zero idea. I just wanted the problem fixed at this point.  Instead, I said: "I'm making dinner now but I'll look at the final amount after dinner."  

I looked after dinner and they charged me again for the phone. They added it to my account.  Now I'll have to phone them (pun intended) tomorrow to fix that part. He said an exchange was fine so it should only be a restocking fee and taxes.  Heaven help us all if it's not.  

Yes, I know I said that I would pay anything. That was hyperbole, now that I know it might be a thing.

It's almost 9:00 pm PST as I post this and the phone hasn't rang again.

Yet.



No comments: