27 March 2009

Romance is...

Did you see the proposal blog link of Bloggess the other day? OMG. I want to marry the guy! He posted that comments could include how we were proposed to or any marriage advice to share.

In February, there are always lots of articles about romance, love stories, etc. One that caught my eye...in Redbook, I think...was titled "Romance is..." and it featured short stories of women explaining how they knew their partner loved them.

I know Kevin loves me because:

He makes me laugh, every single day, purposefully.
He makes sure my truck has oil, gas, tires, and all things that it needs.
He sung "You had a bad day" when I lost my job.
He shoveled snow, repeatedly, this winter.
He turns on the closet light during dark mornings vs. the overhead light to wake me up.
He doesn't really care if we have breakfast for dinner.
He says "That wasn't awful" when dinner is something he likes or it turns out particularly well.

Kevin is rarely in a surly mood. He usually recognizes it in himself and goes outside to the shop until it subsides. He tends to go work things out and then come back in instead of inflicting whatever is wrong on me. Likewise, if I'm in a bitchy mood. He acknowledges it ("Are you grumpy?" which is really not a good question to ask a grouchy person), he asks if he can help - once, and then he lets me go on my own. He has learned that mostly I need to work it out myself and I have learned that if I want help: I need to ask.

Kevin is a pull your hair like a six-year-old boy rather than a gently brushing my hair out of my eyes romance novel guy.

Our proposal wasn't creative, or flashy or anything terribly remarkable:

It was Valentines Day in 1993. Kevin had sent flowers to work for me with a nice card. Valentines Day is a "No phone, no computer, no television" evening....as is our anniversary and birthdays. We always go out to dinner or bring dinner home. We were going out that night and I was getting ready when Kevin came home. He sat down tiredly at the kitchen table and gave me my card. This should have been my first clue. He never sits still, ever.

It was a big, flowery, prose-filled, fold-out card that took a minute to read. He wrote at the bottom:
"I love you very much. Will you marry me?"

Well. Yes! of course was the answer. He wanted me to choose a ring with him otherwise, he would have had one. (This was good, because we have very different tastes in rings!)
He went into the shower and asked me to come in. (get your mind out of the gutter!!! that was later...)

I asked him when he was thinking of a wedding. I was thinking of December... I know, everyone groans when I say that...Through the shower curtain, I hear "I was thinking May."
I remember standing there, literally counting on my fingers "March, April, Ma...Have you lost your mind!?!?!"

Once he proposed, it seemed, he wanted to get the show on the road. We'd both been married before & we both had church weddings. Kevin suggested getting married outside here at the house. Perfect!!! And so it was done.

So three months later, we were married! Now it's been 16 years in May. Many peaks, many valleys, sunshine & rain and a few dark & lonely roads later, we're still here.

Romance is: whatever you chose it to be.


3 comments:

Bethany said...

Aw, how beautiful that proposal was! Very special for you :) I look forward to a day when I can share any kind of romantic story...lol!

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

Beautiful! Victor proposed to me and insisted we get married 6 weeks later. Everyone assumed I was pregant. I wasn't. It was weird.

knitbot said...

Cute!