Dear Miss Manners

A friend of mine recently asked for advice as to how to break up with a friend. YIKES.
I know this is a situation we've all had to face, including myself. I'm sure a Google Search would gather many suggestions however, this is much more fun.

And, yes, I'm assuming she's not talking about me. (:-D

Here's the original question:

OK so I have a problem. I have a friend who has pretty much veered into the passive/aggressive friend territory. As I am no longer a teenager I have no patience for passive/aggressive land. I want to break up with her but she is pretty integrated into my circle of friends and is now dating one of my friends. Suggestions?

Here was my initial suggestion:

Oh no. Breaking up with a friend is more difficult than breaking up with a boyfriend I think.

I've just faded into the woodwork in the past. Stop returning calls, being too busy for getting together until it naturally ends. Totally Ussy-Pay of me, I realize.

It sounds like a confrontation will be non-productive at best and damaging to other friendships at worst. And as much as Dear Abby et all recommend confrontation & honesty, I've found that it's not true. Most people aren't mature or open enough to deal with it.

Any help? it doesn't seem helpful. Let me think on it....

Her response was that she had already tried the disappearing tactic but it didn't work. It seems the person is someone she sees regularly while going about her normal life.

Then I said:
I guess just calling her on her sh*t when she does it. Think of something ahead of time to say when she does it. My nephew usually says an over-emphasized "WOW" when someone says something harsh. It's funny but also draws your attention to it.
Also, I have found myself saying "Oh. My. God. You did not just say that and mean it!!!!"

That was a suggestion I was given when dealing with someone I knew was flat out lying: just acknowledging it as it happens.

Either that or carry a spray bottle to spray her with whenever she does it. bwahahaaaaaa.

So, dear blogger friends, do you have any ideas or suggestions? We've all been through this, probably on both sides. How did you deal with a situation like this? Post a comment or a link to your blog!