A few milestone dates have passed and it usually makes me a little wistful. This year has been no exception.
The thing about grief...grief as in not just loss from death but lost love or lost friendship...is that a person can never predict when it will appear. Like Sneaky Little Bastard, it sneaks up on you; staying for days, weeks or hours. Most times a person can predict a trigger. Dates and photographs seem to create struggles for me. Sometimes it just shows up unannounced.
There is no rationalization, logic, or consoling. Much like a toddler, I will want what is lost to the point of irrationality. "But I WANT it." I want the friendship. I want the intimacy, the connection. The history.
I just f&*king want it.
As much as it simply is not possible, the heart wants what the heart wants.
4 comments:
Ugh. I know that feeling. It is all too familiar.
The view is beautiful.
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. But this post is beautiful and poignant.
I loved this post so much!! I am going through some of that and it really spoke to me. It is beautifully written too. Thank you for sharing.
PS I am totally using it for my fb status update.
Thank you everyone! I appreciate your kind words, as always.
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