Kevin has often made the joke about dying before I do. "You'll be fine" he always says, "Sure, you'll be sad for a minute but you'll be fine." He's joking, of course. Usually I respond in kind.
One of the funniest moments of our relationship was discussing where we wanted to be buried/scattered. Kevin said he didn't know and shrugged off any suggestions I made. When I finally said "What? You want me to just carry you around on the dash of the truck for the rest of my life?"
He exclaimed "What? What makes you think I'M going first, you heartless wench!?!"
We've planned ahead, we have life insurance policies, and we know what the others wishes are regarding final preparations. We've discussed it beyond joking. Kevin knows I will be fine and he wants me to continue my life if he passes. I think he views me as strong and independent and not necessarily needing him.
He couldn't be more wrong. He is my lifeline. He is my anchor. To quote BFF C, he is my people. (I still have that text, BFF C. Thank you) I cannot, nor want to, imagine my life without him.
Because without him, I could very well become Miss Havisham, wandering through this house alone and wondering what happened to my life.
So, baby, know that while I am strong, I am independent, and as much as I can do on my own: I can't do it without you.
3 comments:
I know exactly how you feel. This made me tear up.
i'm right there w/ you. the hubs and i have this conversation from time to time. we have the life insurance, understand each other on the plug/unplug issues, etc. but we haven't bought burial plots yet. he also thinks he'll die before me and that i will be fine. he is also wrong in that notion.
Aww...I would be a mess without any of my people, especially my husband! Though I kid him that when he goes I am going to go marry all my celebrity boyfriends as they are just waiting for that moment!
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