29 January 2009

Show & Tell

The other day I experienced something that I am sure most bloggers have had to deal with: How to decide who to share the blog with and who not to share the blog with.

Just a re-cap for those of you just joining us: I started this blog a few years ago on a whim. I shared it with my BFF's first then opened it up to the big wide world of the internet. Slowly but surely, readers began to read regularly. Then I was accepted into the BlogHer world and so it goes. It's like that 70's shampoo commercial: "And they told two friends, and they told two friends."

Slowly, I've told people in my life about the blog but I've been really choosy as to whom. As I tell stories about my family a lot, my family isn't aware of the blog. It's not that I talk unkindly about them, I just feel it's safer to have them not know; less risk of anyone having hurt feelings or feeling uncomfortable.

Also, I respect my friends & family privacy and usually use initials or nicknames when I'm talking about them.

And then there's me. I've kept my profile anonymous, probably more because I'm a big chicken than anything else. And to be honest, it's a little fun being anonymous. Being Firegirl is much more interesting. One day I'll change my profile with my very boring, white bread, name and a current picture. But not today.

Meanwhile...jeez I get off topic easily...you should experience me in real life...

My co-worker J knows about the blog. I shared it with her about a year ago as I felt she'd enjoy it and keep it on the down low. And she did. (Thanks J!!!) Otherwise, I don't talk about it at work and I don't usually write while I'm working. (If you see week-day posts, it's usually because I've scheduled them)

Another co-worker accidentally found out about the blog. No big deal, really. She actually was kind of eaves-dropping over J's shoulder. Now, I'm not embarrassed, I'm not mad (stop feeling badly J!!!) but it is a little disconcerting.

And it puts me in a spot. She pointedly asked "I asked you if you had a blog and you said no." which is not quite accurate. I've actually demurred and changed the subject without actually answering when she's asked. She implied but didn't directly say "Well, "J" knows about it..."

Since then, she's been a little stand-offish. Not seeming mad, probably more has her feelings hurt. I feel a little guilty but simply, I don't necessarily want her to see the blog. I just feel like it would end badly. An inappropriate comment posted, something said during a staff meeting...my mind reels at the possibilities.

Now, I've been fretting a little about how to approach this. Do I say something? Or do I just let it go? Do I just cowboy up and give her the address? (the answer is already no but I wanted to list that as an option all the same) I bounced it off my boss, who is a no-bullshit kind of lady, and she said to just leave it. So I am. But still, I'll feel badly about it for awhile.


Not Your Aunt Bea said...

Leave it alone. She's already tried searching for it anyway and sometimes things just have to be private. For revenge, she can start her own secret blog.

Dynamita said...

I say, if she asks again, you can say it's anonymous and you would like to keep it that way, and thank you for understanding about privacy.

Swistle said...

She is acting like such a BABY! I'm always surprised to find there are adults who think that if ONE person knows, THEY should know too.

I might leave it, but I might not be able to resist trying to think of a way to at least tell her that I really didn't lie to her but only avoided answering.

Firegirl said...

Bea...I lol'd because I know you're right, she probably has tried to search for it.

Dyn...I think it will come up again, just not soon. I've decided to go with "It isn't something that I'm willing to share right now."

Swistle...YES, she is acting like we're in middle school. She's been all fluttery and weird since.

Thanks blogger friends!! Knew I could count on you. (;-D