What's In Your Wallet

Kevin's brother has been mentioned here a few times.  I'm going to sum it up as he is difficult at best.  Then I'm going to provide the following examples and let the jury decide.

His brother is known to spend ridiculous amounts of money on ridiculous things.  A new golf cart, including custom tires and wheels and upholstery, and stereo is the most recent example.  He doesn't golf and it's for use for the racecar.  The racecar that only gets used about three times a summer.  AND he fusses about putting in his truck and wants Kevin to haul it for him instead.  

For a while, whenever he would order something for his racecar, he would order one for Kevin too.  Then he would say "Oh, just pay me whenever."  This may seem generous but know that "whenever" would get mentioned a few times before we could/would pay him.  As in "When I bought us those..."  "You have those things now so..." And this would be said to friends, family, Kevin, as a gentle reminder that a) he was cool and bought that for him and 2) he hadn't been repaid.

I rarely lose my temper.  RARELY.  Of the handful of times that it has occurred, it has been something like this that he has done.  

Once he did something like the above and we didn't have the money to fund it.  I mean, super really didn't have the money.  If I remember correctly, it was when Kevin was sick and I wasn't working.  The money wasn't there, at all.  It felt like it was a "kindness" soaked in loan-sharkery.  I told Kevin that he needed to understand that if he ever did it again, it would be considered a gift because I wasn't paying him.  One would think that would stop it.  It didn't.

But the best worst example was his birthday.  He chose to go to hibachi-style Japanese food for his birthday, as is his right. The place we went to was EXPENSIVE.  And this was known.   His birthday is in January when EVERYONE is poor. So, maybe a little awareness is needed but whatever.  

Kevin in all his generosity told him (without me knowing) that he would buy his brother's dinner as a present.  Not thinking that it would expensive or let's just say not thinking.  I was annoyed and told Kevin to next time, just check in with me first.  I mean it's after Christmas, one of our vehicles was in the mechanic shop, and we were what I refer to as dirt-floor-poor at that point.  

DUDE ORDERED FILET MIGNON AND LOBSTER.  AND SUSHI.

Filet.Mignon.AND.Lobster.AND. Sushi.

There were two schools of thought: 

It was his birthday so he got to order what he wanted.  

OR

Recognize that it was a very expensive meal someone else was buying for you and perhaps dial it back.

I couldn't fix-my-face when he ordered and Kevin was quietly begging me to not react.  Too late. I can't always control my face.  

So then the brother half-heartedly offers "Oh, I'll pay for it. don't worry."  Followed with "Well, I'll pay for the drinks and the sushi..." over Kevin's objections.

Now it's become a pride issue with Kevin, which the brother knew it would be.  Hi, Captain Manipulative, Happy Birthday.

(My blood pressure is rising now and it's been YEARS since this happened.)

We paid after all and I ended up using a credit card that we were keeping for emergencies.  Crossing my fingers that the mechanic bill wasn't too big or that nothing else went wrong that would precipitate us needing those funds.

So...there's the history. 

This summer we were scheduled to go to a race and he had ordered the tickets.  We paid him as soon as the tickets were ordered, because it's a thing now.  With the pandemic, the event was cancelled and he let Kevin know that the money had already been refunded to his account.

*drum roll, please*

He says And I Quote:  "I don't know how I'm going to get the cash to you because it's so hard to go to the bank RIGHT NOW."

Wait...like, seriously: WHAT

Kevin told me this on the phone to avoid the incoming debris from the explosion of my head.  "Umm, no it's NOT.  It's not different than before. BECAUSE THERE ARE CASH MACHINES EVERYWHERE."  *gesturing all around me*

Then he also wondered if he could have the sister-in-law just write us a check.

Because then *I* would have to go to the bank and not him.  And it's 1995.

I told Kevin that I wasn't that worried about it and that they needed to figure out how to get us cash.  S-i-l is home because of the pandemic and they are NOT hurting for money.  It's not an unreasonable expectation. As we've established, were roles reversed, the same expectation would be applied to us.

He told his brother that and then the brother helpfully explained that I could just download an app on my phone and not have to go to the bank.  Okay...yes, I could.  But I don't have banking apps on my phone on purpose.  And, again, how did this become MY Problem to solve?  Dude. Seriously. 

Well, I noticed a chunk of cash in a change bowl this morning so apparently he managed to figure it out somehow.  It's one of those topics that Kevin and I won't discuss because there are no winners, only losers and annoyance.  

This is where I tell you that dude ALWAYS has at least $500 in cash in his wallet at any given time.  It is A Thing with him and is widely known.  The refund was significantly less than that amount.  But, you know, going to the bank is just really too hard.