Three for the Road

I'm tired, it's muggy, and I can't dogdamned breathe so here's three funny stories to share:

#1
The other day while racing, Nephew and I were on the racetrack waiting for Kevin.  There's usually a lot going on up there and being aware is important.  However, as we're standing there, I spotted a Dodge truck pulling out of the racetrack. "DODGE!!" I yell at the Nephew.

The expression on his face was priceless, absolutely incredulous mixed in with "Are you effing Kidding Me Right Now?"  I started laughing "Rule Number 3 of Dodge: You're Never Not Playing."

I should have gotten extra points for that, for sure.


#2
As often happens, I'm not patient with my hair.  I have resigned myself to kind of letting it go where it may.  Cowlicks are just a thing.  The other morning as we were readying to leave, Kevin just looked at me and said "You're hair...looks...uncomfortable."

I actually stopped what I was doing...."Un.comfort.able?"  What the actual hell does that mean, even.  I looked and yeah, it was a little out of control.  I still don't know that uncomfortable was the word but it made me laugh.

#3
Kevin was helping one of our friends on the racetrack.  This friend is known to have a short attention span and we make jokes about it endlessly.  So, it was no surprise when he just about hit Kevin with his car.  I mean, it wasn't that bad but it was definitely a close call.

So afterward, Kevin approaches our friend, calm as can be, friendly even.
"You know, Harry, when you wanted me to help you out there.  And I did.  Because that's what friends do: they help. I'm always willing to help and I believe I did.  Because that's what friends do."

Still totally calm, friendly, thoughtful even; he continues: "What they don't do though is RUN A MOTHER EFFER OVER!!" he exclaims.

I was laughing so hard that I was crying.

And there you go...three things that at least one made you laugh.