50 Minutes

I only talk to my mom about once every month or so.  Here's how the conversation always goes:

An announcement.  Like when she told me my ex-husband's wife died.  Usually it is a death related news item; because the obituaries are like headlines to her at this point of her life.  Today is an elderly neighbor has died.

Then it seques into whoever's birthday is next.  Today is my brothers, which we are celebrating on  Thanksgiving.

Then we "talk" (I would call it listening, she would call it talking) about how my aunt who has Alzheimer's. Lately, my mom has made the point that SHE does not have Alzheimer's but is just getting older.  We already know that her memory has faded so nice try, mom.

She also has COPD but she insists that she is always getting over a cold. It's an endless cold.

There is usually a weather or house update sprinkled in there.  Today was both: tree fell on the shop, there are maple leaves on the beach, and the lake has had ice.  And the chimney is leaking.

Then ping-pong back between any of those topics.  For an hour. Or more. Thank you sweet tiny baby jesus for speakerphone.

There is usually one "OMG" moment.  I think that's Kevin's favorite part of these conversations.  I'm trying to think of an example but I'm drawing a blank.  I will come back and edit if I remember one.

She suddenly just announced "I don't give donations to churches"  Umm, okay.  Don't, then?  This is something that my dad would usually say so I am a little surprised she said it.  I didn't ask why. No one has time for that.

There is never a question about how I'm doing. She'll ask about Kevin's parents but rarely, you know, her kid.

Oh, here's another topic: she's bent out of shape that her bills have addresses that keep changing.  We don't know why she's mad about this, she just is. Because 84-years-old.

She tends to call in the late afternoon and always ends it with "You probably need to get off the phone and start dinner for Kevin."  I always say yes, even if I'm not.  (Like today when he's in Vegas and it's 4:00.)

I know this could be filed under "Someday you're going to miss this" but I'm thinking: no, probably not.